Daisy, 12, was not being forced. Instead, she had insisted to her father to get her married. She told me how poor her parents were, how her brothers and sisters all slept on the floor of their one-room hut. Her father sold paan, her eldest sister had been abandoned by her husband, and her other sister was in an abusive marriage.
She had known the groom for five years, she claimed. She met his family, who were better off in her eyes: “They had a bed and a fan.” I asked who she would turn to if there was a problem at her in-laws, she said it did not matter, she would prefer to die there. If there was no way for her to get married, she would commit suicide. Her outlook was bleak.
She remained stubborn when I tried to convince her that being unmarried and older was not a problem. When I told her I was 31 and had only just gotten married, she glared at me with big eyes.
There was a gap between us – of opportunities, social status, and mindset. I was privileged to grow up in an environment where I was allowed a secure space to think, grow, and feel like an independent individual. Even though both my younger sisters had gotten married before me, I knew my rights.
The chairman of Pragpur Union in Daulatpur Upazila, and Sufia Begum, a social worker, spoke of why these cases were happening so frequently in their union. The district commissioner of Kushtia is very concerned regarding the number of cases. He also feels it is positive that recently more people have been calling him directly. There have been increasing reports where the civil administration has been able to intervene and break up several underage marriages. Recently, he started a campaign to make young girls aware.
At a time when the government is celebrating advances in women’s health, education, and economic opportunities, it has taken a step backwards, which is contradictory to the “Vision 2021” plan it had announced to achieve gender equality by addressing the poverty issues, particularly those faced by women.
In her report after her visit to Bangladesh in 2013, the UN Special rapporteur on Violence Against Women pointed out that there had been zero expenditure for the National Women’s Development Policy in 2013-14, despite the allocated budget for this ministry. The Ministry of Women and Children Affairs is supposed to be responsible for developing laws and policies to ensure the economic empowerment and participation of women.
Instead, the minister is allowing teenagers to marry, instead of introducing measures to improve their lives and opportunities. Does the minister feel that these young girls do not have the right to development, or economic security?
In 2011, the government had committed to the National Women’s Development Policy, which seeks to reduce violence, eliminate discrimination, increase access to education, health, and employment, and address the special needs of older women, women with disabilities, and women from indigenous and marginalised communities.
Why have there been no work plan or initiatives taken since 2011, despite there being a budget for these measures? The number of cases of early marriage in Daulatpur is alarming. Often, those who are working in the civil administration despair at the band-aid solutions they provide in these scenarios. Daisy was given Tk5,000 for her education. How long will that last?
An assistant commissioner (land) for Daulatpur Upazila, spoke about the challenges faced in dealing with such cases, each one distinctly pointing to economic impoverishment as the main reason for parents marrying their daughters off.
Acting as a magistrate, Nahida has run several mobile courts which have resulted in the father or potential suitor being fined, arrested, or jailed. Nahida feels the recent lowering of the legal age for marriage will only increase the number of cases she has to deal with, as now more 14 or 15-year-olds will look to marriage as an option for their livelihood.
The state should understand the reasons for underage marriage, and draw up practical action plans after conducting proper, district-wide research on possible initiatives.
Unlike other developing countries where parents worry more about the maturity of their 16-year-old daughter wanting to get married, in Bangladesh, daughters are seen as an economic burden or liability. The district commissioner of Kushtia spoke about the anxiety families have for the security of their daughters once they have reached physical maturity.
Recently, a teacher was caught for sexually assaulting 30 teenage girls. Girls are not safe at school, on the streets, or even their own homes. Perhaps the government should focus on tackling these issues instead of sending further lambs to the slaughter with such a dangerous policy.
The DC of Kushtia interestingly mentioned that if the government is changing the age for marriage, they should also reconsider the age for youth who commit crimes. In the court of law, those under the age of 18 have to be tried in a juvenile court; their age is considered in deciding their punishment. What factors are taken into consideration when determining the age of maturity? Who in the government is deciding the age limits? Can one be too young to commit a crime, but old enough to marry?
