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বাংলা
Dhaka Tribune

Lost interests

Update : 10 May 2015, 01:40 PM

Hi, I have been dealing with an issue for the last few months. I have noticed that my wife is not interested in me anymore. She seems aloof and does not even want to get intimate with me anymore. I have tried talking to her but nothing helps. I think the reason for it may be the fact that I am much older than her. Our age gap is of about nine years and I am afraid that it is taking a toll on our relationship now. Things had been smooth for the first five years of our marriage but now things are not working out anymore. She is slowly losing interest and won’t admit it. Please tell me what I can do about it.

 

I understand your concern and worry, but your difference of age has nothing to do with what is going on. Most marriages go through what you are experiencing. What is important right now is communication.

Communication is not about telling someone off or complaining; it is about sharing how you feel without blaming the other.

How do you do that? Tell your wife about it. Even when you feel that she is doing something to upset you, just tell her “I feel sad,” instead of pointing fingers and saying, “You make me upset.” Ask her for her opinion on how to make things better. Remember what it was like when you used to court her? Women pay attention to small details. Ask her to go for a walk with you or for ice cream. Bring her flowers on your way home from work. Be patient and be loving, anger and bitterness do not magnetise a relationship, they destroy it.

Our Agony Aunt is a life coach and a relationship coach as well as a corporate and organisational consultant. AA lives and works in Bangladesh but travels extensively around the world to attend seminars and see her clients

Moving on

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