What are we doing wrong?

You don’t have to be a meticulous observer to realize that we are living in a dangerous world. Despite some positivity, social media is full of news and comments that hurl abuse. Too many comments are derogatory and insult individuals, race, or ethnic groups; or it’s a cruel comment about tragic incidents.  Do you remember how some people made comments about particular victims of US-Bangla plane crash on March 12, 2018, or about the recent attack on Zafar Iqbal, or about a local political leader cutting the fingers of a 6-year-old? There is even a viral video on the social media showing how a group of children aged five to 10 executed a cat for eating their pet pigeon. All of this forces us to face the truth: Past generations grew up without proper cognitive as well as emotional intelligence, and we are not doing anything better for our kids either. With this prelude, I draw your attention to the need for emotional intelligence (EI) along with cognitive intelligence. What is EI?Emotional intelligence was first popularized by Daniel Goleman, a science journalist, in 1995 in his book Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ. The concept has evolved, so has our understanding of it and its impact on human behaviour. It’s the “person’s ability to identify, evaluate, control, regulate, and express emotions, appropriately and effectively. People with high IQ do not always have emotional/social intelligence and may lack the skills to be successful in real life.” Many recent studies suggested that there is a strong correlation between emotional intelligence and moral intelligence. Peace, tolerance, compassion, forgiveness, kindness, and integrity  are some of the universal values that we all cherish across cultures and are byproducts of our complex emotions and feelings. Starting earlyKindergartens and elementary schools can play a profound role in harvesting emotional intelligence in children. For that, they need to incorporate some additional cost-effective teaching tools, aid, and exercises in their everyday academic curriculum. The Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence has developed a model or program called RULER for schools and brings it into practice from preschool to high schools in the US to develop emotionally intelligent kids. RULER stands for recognizing, understanding, labelling, expressing, and regulating emotions. Their approach is very practical, easy, and effective.  

Past generations grew up without proper cognitive as well as emotional intelligence, and we are not doing anything better for our kids either

PreschoolsKids at preschools learn more by exploration. All preschoolers, more or less, have the opportunity to engage in fun activities -- and to make these more “emotional-intelligence-boosting” activities, we can add some more activities: 1. Associating a colour with one’s feelings 2. Reading books which express the emotions of various characters 3. Dancing, singing, and reciting with  animated songs/rhymes 4. Playing with different shapes and building blocks 5. Playing games that require children to take turns 6. Also, we can introduce Mood-o-Meter in our classrooms, which is a simple tool that kids can use every day to identify their feelings or emotional state 7. Exposure to nature has an immense impact on kids’ psyche  Japanese preschoolers aged 3-4 years old attend school not to learn numbers and alphabets, but they learn things like respect for their school, the importance of group interaction, language skills, and how to cooperate with others to achieve common goals.Elementary schoolsIn Bangladesh, elementary/primary level education consists of grades from 1-5. It is a schooling system that exposes children to frequent exams and performance evaluation, competition, and ranking. Children have little room for exploration, playtime, and self-expression, which not only severely limits their emotional intelligence development but also impede cognitive development. However, with simple learning tools, enthusiastic teachers of both private and government primary schools can still make huge differences. Here are some examples that teachers can try to harvest emotional intelligence among children: 1. Introducing Mood-o-meter and following reflection sessions to help children identify their and others’ feelings 2. Keeping “feelings” or “emotions” charts in the classroom 3. Stories/ poems/rhymes in both Bangla and English can be used to practice RULER in the classroom 4. Once a week, children need to enjoy two to three hours recess time, when they are allowed to do whatever they would like to do 5. Gardening in the school premise also boosts emotional intelligence in children 6. Teachers can make good use of different national or international days of significance to teach students appreciation, empathy, and much more. Children can also be encouraged to talk about their feelings and victims’ feelings on any local or international man-made or natural disasters. For instane, on March 11, 2018, NHK, a Japanese international TV channel, aired a documentary “Lives shaped by Loss: 23 years after the Kobe Earthquake” on three survivors of the Great Hanshin-Awaji Earthquake. They were among the 400 children who had lost one or both parents in that devastating earthquake. NHK has followed these children into adulthood, documenting how the tragedy has shaped their lives. At one point of the documentary, a teacher in an elementary school asked his students to write a letter to their mothers appreciating her. In that class, one girl’s mother was a survivor who lost both of her parents. It was a very emotionally charged exercise for both, especially for the daughter, to reflect on what her mother had to endure in all these years and how lucky she is to have a mother as her. Despite all the challenges and odds in our current education system, innovative and enthusiastic teachers with the existing resources can incorporate many elements in a classroom setting to boost emotional intelligence. However, for lasting and systemic change we need to have an institutional framework to support these kinds of lessons in the classroom. Thereby, collaboration among government, educationists, and private sectors to develop a comprehensive strategy, curriculum, teachers’ training, and assessment that measures learning, child-friendly preschools and elementary schools should be our top priority.Rizwana Akhter is an Education Management specialist and development professional, working in the development sector with national and international NGOs for 16 years.