It’s that time of the year again when your newsfeed is filled with photos and news of people getting married around you, and you're thinking about which suit or sari you’ll have to repeat at their events. Yes, the wedding season is back in full swing, bringing with it all kinds of mixed feelings. While the kachchi is what we're mostly looking forward to, weddings can be made fun as well if you know your way around it.
Read on to find out about the games and norms that make Bangladeshi weddings a grand affair like no other.
Game: Hodor’s Quest
If you’ve been drafted on the bride’s side, you have a great responsibility on your shoulders—you must hold the door as if you're trying to save Bran’s life. However, if you’ve been drafted on the groom’s side, think of yourself as a White Walker and that, you need to power through the Wall without the ice dragon (it doesn’t count as a spoiler after three months).
If you don’t get the reference (God bless you if you don’t), we are talking about the phenomenon that we refer to as “gate-dhora” at weddings. To put you upto speed, gate-dhora has been a popular form of entertainment/norm for Bangladeshi weddings to the extent that there have been reports of fights at the gate between the two sides who won’t budge an inch.
Agree on a predetermined amount which will be handed over at the gate to avoid a black eye or a bloody nose.
Game: Hodor’s Quest (Part deux)
This time, the game introduces an interesting plot twist—the newly wed couple needs to defeat the forces of the groom’s side in order to complete the mission—get to their bashor ghor.
The second edition is not as popular among everyone although those who enjoy haggling would go back to the game. The prospect of the role-reversal allows the groom’s team to experience life on the other side.
Just like the previous edition, the wisest thing to do is to decide on an amount again since the couple is likely to be very tired from taking a gazillion photos at the event. To make things easier for the couple (especially the groom who is always on the losing side), Team Groom can strike a deal to use this amount along with the one paid to the bride’s side to plan a weekend getaway or a dinner.
Game: Thief of Persia
The objective is relatively simple if you have the senses and the composure of the Prince, given you're on the bride’s team. All you have to do is keep an eye on the groom’s shoes to carve out a convenient window to steal them only to be returned after a monetary transaction has been completed. However, your path will be obstructed by antagonists, the dark forces of the groom side.
I've been personally part of a juta-churi incident that turned violent. It was at my cousin’s wedding in 1999 when grooms would still require to take off their shoes before getting up on the stage. We conveniently stole our dulabhai’s naagras and while we were at it, a fight broke out which was obviously neutralised the next morning.
Trust me when I say this, agree on an amount to avoid a fight from breaking out.
Game: Aynabaji (Snow White edition)
Yet another ingrained ritual at Bangladeshi weddings, the rusmat is essentially a fun tradition where the bride and the groom would be asked what they see in the reflection on the mirror facing them. The primary objective is to make the couple blush (without any monetary transaction in the money spinning tournament we know as biye-shaadi) with bonus objectives of obstructing the groom from putting on the wedding garland on the bride.
Usually a non-violent game that is safe for all, the whole point of this ritual is to form a bond between the two sides which usually ends in laughter, and memorable photos for you to look back at.