Summer arrived in a fiery chariot this year, it came straight from the depths of hell. A heatwave so devilish that I half expected to find Lucifer sitting in my living room, sipping on a chilled lemonade, asking for the Wi-Fi password.
Me: Have I mistakenly welcomed the devil himself?
Devil: Wasn’t it you who celebrated my arrival upon the earth this year?
Me: Did I? Oh, wait … I did.
Devil (Smiling): Tell me your summer plans! Do you wanna book a vacation to Venus?
Me: Are you kidding? Hell no!
Devil: Alright. Just let me play a song for your hospitality and for offering me a lemonade!
♪
Well
Reverend, reverend, please come quick
'Cause I've got something to admit
I met a man out in the sticks of Good Ol' Miss
He drove a series 10 Cadillac and wore a cigar on his lip
Don't you know the devil wears a suit and tie
Saw him driving down the 61 in early July
White as a cotton field and sharp as a knife
I heard him howling as he passed me by
♪
Despite the unbearable weather, people found comfort in knowing they were not alone in their struggle. Everyone is doing what they can to beat the heat
Since then, I’ve been feeling guilty about welcoming Satan and his siblings this year.
One minute I am enjoying a perfectly temperate day; the next, I am living inside a barbecue grill previously owned by Satan himself. No, this is a heat so brutal that even the sunflowers are looking for shade.
Birds stop mid-tweet, ice creams melt in defiance before they could kiss the cone.
My once-cosy apartment has turned into a steam room. I tried all the tricks: Closing the blinds, standing in front of the open fridge (my apologies to the environment), and I even considered investing in an air conditioner -- but I’m pretty sure Satan would just laugh and swallow it whole.
I have trouble sleeping at night due to the heatwave. Sometimes I dream that I live in Ragnarok. Unusual thoughts, like imagining my bed as a stove or turning myself into a human cocktail by filling the bathtub with ice, keep creeping in. But I know that these thoughts are just a result of my desperation to find relief from my insomnia.
I do not feel like turning on the stove, so I sometimes settle for raw or quickly cooked-food options.
Social media has become a battleground of heatwave hacks and summer survival memes. Despite the unbearable weather, people found comfort in knowing they were not alone in their struggle. Everyone is doing what they can to beat the heat.
As I write this, the heatwave shows no signs of packing up its fiery bags. However, facing this inferno has armed me with a new set of survival skills and a deep appreciation for winter. Who knew that a lost devil could teach me so much about the value of shade, hydration, and the simple joy of a cool breeze?
Kaniz Fatema is a Sub-Editor, Dhaka Tribune.